So true...

Small Straws In A Soft Wind by Marsha Burns -- November 18, 2008:

Beloved, as long as your focus is on things that you have no personal control over, you will be subject to regret, disappointment and accusation. But, I would have you release what you cannot control and to put your faith and trust in Me. Only then will you be able to see that I am doing a very great and powerful work in your midst, My people, as I establish My kingdom in, around and through you. Expect change, and resolve to be flexible enough to move with grace, says the Lord.
Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.

Questions. Thankyou. Sorry.

Is it ok that I dont learn things the first time. That I knock my head once or twice?
Is it ok that I dont run the same pace than all the rest?
Is it ok that there are still child like attributes in me at 28?
Does being an adult mean having it all together?
Why is it that people misunderstood me, but I have never found that youth or children misunderstand me?

Thanks to those who take the time to know the real me, and not your preconceptions.
Thanks to those who commit to walking with me right to the end, even when I fall short.
Thank you to friends who listen first and who ask God before answering. and thanks so much for your patience and commmitment to working at our relationship
Thank you to my parents for consistently giving even when you say where's everyone else now, and you really are one of the only who gives towards me.
Thank you Lord for taking your time with me, and putting effort in me and transformming me back into the beautiful bride that you saw when you picked me up out of the miry clay...
thanks to the people who reflect jesus

Sorry for making you wait so long while i procastinate, over commit, dont know how to cut things short or do but dont.
Sorry for not always being a person of my word. But getting caught up with what goes on in the moment
Thank you to sara groves for singing truth:

and it gets when you hit at the hearts of the ones I love
when everything you touch is rubble and dust
and it gets so hard to know how to trust

I will not let that bitter root grow...
I will not let it no no..
But it gets so hard...

and every time I find healing, you making a new mess, and i am learning the real meaning of forgiveness...

Psalm 23

God has just blessed me last night with this Psalm opening it up for me and by this I hope that you the reader will be blessed too. Taking it from a chat I had with a friend, so dont write same thing twice, but really wouldnt put this up if didnt think it was for everyone...

Went to bed last night reading Psalm 23
me: and really blessed by it
me: new revelations

11:25 AM me: Thing is this is the God that we have (according to Psalm 23) He takes care of us, we should not want... he takes me out of the environment that is causing more stress, and just brings me to a place where i can restore my soul.. Then he guides me in his ways...for his name sake

11:27 AM me: God does all of this before we face troubles, issues, questions, sin, temptation, death or anything that leads to death...So that when we do face it we know that he is with us, we know that he is comforting us in the midst of it, even though we are facing those things, we dont fear, becuase we know God, because he is our shepherd

11:29 AM me: He takes it a step further an anoints us and even blesses us in the the presence of our enemies, it's like me 2 weeks ago I think when I fell to one of my temptations and was beating myself up...but even while the Devil was about to rip me apart with condemnation God prepares a table for me in the presence of my enemies by giving me that opp to drive to that farm an hour or so from my house...(get into nature, and just restore my soul, got paid to take the guy and ate lekker (nice) and met great new people and grew in business skills...He prepares a table for me in the presence of my enemies...My Cup overflows

11:31 AM me: Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life... Thats the God we serve... Know that He is your shepherd. Know that he is taking care of you, know that he is with you, and comforting you and you will see love and goodness all the days even the bad days...And I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever... HOW Awesome.. It doesnt start one day, it's everyday..it's like psalm 27 one thing i ask of the lord, this is what I seek that I may dwell in the house of the lord,...

11:33 AM But still meditating on this :) But really this past weekend again, i had to go on a tour wiht exchange students and they were on a hike/walk in a completely nature secluded place, and 2 girls needed the loo so I walked back with them and sat next to the lake/river with them waiting for the rest and when reading psalm 23 last night I just saw the "He leads me beside quiet waters..."

11:36 AM me: And in the midst of all of this, doesnt mean I'm not going through stuff...I'm going through a whole lot of stuff, lots of questions with no answers lots of frustration with people, myself and lack of finances...But last night he just reminded me of the sitll waters, the table he prepares in the midst of my enemies an I can see all the blessings even in this time, and I see that that is God...So ja (yes) just to end if this you need to hear this too...

The Lord is your shepherd, you shall not be in want. He makes you lie down in green pastures, he leads you besides quiet waters, he restores your soul... (that is what we need hey....what we need...our soul to be restored and he does that) he guides you along paths of righeousness even for His own name sake ( he teaches you his way, he gives you word that builds and rebukes you so you can be more like him)

11:37 AM Even though, you walk through the valley of the shadow of death. You will fear no evil For He is with you! (he is not up in heaven far removed from your life but right there with you) His rod and his staff they comfort you

11:38 AM (amazing how you can hear this PSALM over and over and over or in my case, just like oh ok it's psalm 23 and yet how God can open it up and show you how it's not just psalm 23, but it's him and it;s how he does things, his kingdom principal, and then he takes it further and shows you how he is doing that for you)

11:40 AM God prepares a table for you in the presence of your enemies (right there in the midst of the valley of shadow of death. Even if there is evil all around!) He anoints you with oil and your cup overflows!
More than Enough!
Surely goodness and love will follow you all the days of your life, and you will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

11:41 AM GOD bless you... Enjoy dwelling in His house...Enjoy the feast he prepares for you, and the green pastures he makes you lay down in. Enjoy Your God, because He surely enjoys you
He is for you.
He knows and understands you
11:42 AM He loves you and his love has no limits...
I love psalm 25 and I love all the scriptures (there is one in psalm 25) that refers to NO one who puts their trust in Him will ever be put to shame
No one

11:46 AM Enjoy him...

me: hey I just rememebered an old song we used to sing at our old traditional church at the end of services... for you "May God's blessings Surround You Each day...May You trust Him and walk in his ways...May his presence within, Guard and keep you from sin. Go in peace, Go in love, Go in Joy"

11:53 AM me: found a jazzy version of it for you to listen to :) http://www.amazon.com/May-Gods-Blessing/dp/B000QPHSG8/ref=sr_f2_2?ie=UTF8&s=dmusic&qid=1227001845&sr=102-2

Finishing Strong?

Right now feel peace about not being able to write security.Though my mind tells me i may regret this later, but at the same time I am thinking these thoughts...

That the way I see me needs to be aligned with how He sees me.

Yes I have messed up this year, but God does not see me as messed up.

And if I see me as messed up that doesnt make it easier for me to win in life

In the same way

The way I know God's love defines how I will love others.

The more I love God and allow his love to transform and change and complete me,
The more I will be able to love people in the same way...

Its not about what I think, it's about what He thinks. In him and his ways and his will and his guidance is our strength to live the way he wants us to.

Lord today, I thank you for Your Love.
Thank You Lord for your faithfulness
Thank You that you care and that my life is transformed as I come closer to You
Thank You for your commitment to my life.
I know that though I failed and though my mind is saying you're going to regret this later, that despite that I am not a failure and God hasnt given up on me
No one who puts their trust in Him is ever put to shame
but the secret to that is putting our trust in Him...

God I love You.Thank You. Thank You. Thank You.

Your kingdom come! Your will be done!

Amen

More...

How do we grow. how do we win....? By growing in him and knowing him...Thats what i believe. In my own strength or own view I may keep failing? But as I lift my eyes I find the strength and wisdom i need to face what I need to...

How do I love and forgive my neighbour, by receiving his love. If I'm wrong please do correct me, but right now this is such an awesome summing up of what I've been learning in this time.

that if I see me the way God sees me, then whatever people say doesnt really matter, because I know and experience and enjoy His love, favour and approval.
And if I see people the way God sees me...That is the change, but without knowing and experiencing Him I will never really get it unless I am doing it naturally so before knowing it was God working that in me...

LORD ALL GLORY TO YOUR NAME!

Heart Touchers this weekend

*Salvation of one youth girl
* "With everything, With everything, my heart shouts your praises...WOOO HOOOOOO"
*"Chains be broken, lives be healed, eyes be open, Christ is revealed" - We wait for You Lord...
* "Now in the darkness God’s light shines
Christ forever glorified
So come on come on sing out to God
Now with all we’ve got
We live for You our God"


* (see whole prayer below, this is the part that stood out for me)

Christ be with me,
Christ within me,
Christ before me,
Christ beside me,
Christ to win me,
Christ to comfort and restore me,
Christ beneath me,
Christ above me,
Christ in quiet,
Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me,
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger." - St Patrick


I bind unto myself today the strong name of the Trinity
by invocation of the same,
the Three in One, and One in Three.

I bind this day to me forever,
by power of faith, Christ's incarnation,
his baptism in the Jordan river,
his death on cross for my salvation,
his bursting from the spiced tomb,
his riding up the heavenly way,
his coming at the day of doom:
I bind unto myself today.

I bind unto myself today the virtues of the starlit heaven,
the glorious sun's lifegiving ray,
the whiteness of the moon at even,
the flashing of the lightning free,
the whirling wind's tempestuous shocks,
the stable earth, the deep salt sea
around the old eternal rocks.

I bind unto myself today the power of God to hold and lead,
his eye to watch, his might to stay,
his ear to hearken to my need,
the wisdom of my God to teach,
his hand to guide, his shield to ward,
the word of God to give me speech,
his heavenly host to be my guard.
Against the demon snares of sin,
the vice that gives temptation force,
the natural lusts that war within,
the hostile men that mar my course -
or few or many, far or nigh,
in every place, and in all hours,
against their fierce hostility
I bind to me these holy powers.

Against all Satan's spells and wiles,
against false words of heresy,
against the knowledge that defiles,
against the heart's idolatry,
against the wizard's evil craft,
against the death-wound and the burning,
the choking wave, the poisoned shaft,
protect me, Christ, till thy returning.

Christ be with me,
Christ within me,
Christ before me,
Christ beside me,
Christ to win me,
Christ to comfort and restore me,
Christ beneath me,
Christ above me,
Christ in quiet,
Christ in danger,
Christ in hearts of all that love me,
Christ in mouth of friend and stranger.

The Prayer of St Patrick

I bind unto myself the name,
the strong name of the Trinity,
by invocation of the same,
the Three in One and One in Three,
of whom all nature hath creation,
eternal Father, Spirit, Word.
Praise to the Lord of my salvation:
salvation is of Christ the Lord.
Amen.

Attributed to St Patrick c 389 - 461

Update on the One Big Mengelmoes...

Just said yesterday that I havent had it in 3 months...despite no male interaction at all.
Well today despite all the other stress, i have finally had a breakthru and dont have to worry about having to go the doc about this problem...i dont know why today, but what I do know is I woke up with the scripture Eccl 3:11 "God has made everything beautiful in it's time"
and then also read Psalm 27 and read aloud the part of


7 Hear my voice when I call, O LORD;
be merciful to me and answer me.

8 My heart says of you, "Seek his [b] face!"
Your face, LORD, I will seek.

9 Do not hide your face from me,
do not turn your servant away in anger;
you have been my helper.
Do not reject me or forsake me,
O God my Savior.

10 Though my father and mother forsake me,
the LORD will receive me.

11 Teach me your way, O LORD;
lead me in a straight path
because of my oppressors.

12 Do not turn me over to the desire of my foes,
for false witnesses rise up against me,
breathing out violence.

13 I am still confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.

14 Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.


Dunno if this has a part in why it hasnt been happening. But anyway...Have to go to tech..Exam soon...Didnt really study yet...

Me over the years 9 - 2008, the year I turned 28 and still in progress!