Uuuhhhmmmmmuururrggghhh Sigh...
That is me introspectively looking inside of me, and feeling I don't have love or grace in me to be gracious, yet that is what my names mean and what he gives me all the time Grace...grace despite my mistakes, shortcomings...So why can't I be gracious to others and is it not maybe that some of the grace he is giving me is to be gracious to others...
*frustration from not understanding...
Monday, September 22, 2014
Friday, September 5, 2014
...
Ek het jou nodig, hier by my heeldag, die wêreld oorbodig.
Ons twee 'n taakmag, niks kan ons keer.
Hy's in beheer, Hy's ons Weerman, Stuurman, Leidsman.
Holy Spirit,
Rest Upon me
Make all that is not of you flee
As Your anointing breaks yokes.
Conundrums.
I press into you,
You press into me
Discernment is heightened
All muck is revealed.
The world is insensitive.
or if I euphamize it, street smart.
things outside seem volatile
far from the peace in my heart
Yet as I respond to your beckoning
you trully are my safe place
For this grace I am grateful
Now allow myself in your embrace
Ons twee 'n taakmag, niks kan ons keer.
Hy's in beheer, Hy's ons Weerman, Stuurman, Leidsman.
Holy Spirit,
Rest Upon me
Make all that is not of you flee
As Your anointing breaks yokes.
Conundrums.
I press into you,
You press into me
Discernment is heightened
All muck is revealed.
The world is insensitive.
or if I euphamize it, street smart.
things outside seem volatile
far from the peace in my heart
Yet as I respond to your beckoning
you trully are my safe place
For this grace I am grateful
Now allow myself in your embrace
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
The worlds between how God sees me and how people see me.
I've been struggling recently with this a little. It seems whenever I am lonely from people, God affirms me even more, yet I do struggle with how can what God be saying is true, when I get the exact opposite response from people. And yet I know God loves me, and yet I love myself... That is not the question here. And yet why do I care? And yet do I want to fit into the worlds way, or am I bigger than that...?
I think the issue comes in when I open up to new things. I'm totally fine, on my own. Ok, that is an exaggeration, but truth be told, I enjoy reading, blogging, dreaming, watching series now, etc... Doing my own thing. I am found when I'm with God, I receive, he makes me " When the time comes, I'll be the one asking why...Why did I ever doubt you"... So when I'm in him, I am content... but then when I open up to relationships, I am always dissappointed when dissappointment comes. Maybe its cause I dont expect it. Or maybe its cause I'm stepping out and taking a risk...But why does it seem everyone else fits in so much easier, Why does it seem that others aren't walking alone...
And why I am I focused on the nots (nao's), instead of the ares...(Ser/Estar's)
Because the truth is God is doing pretty amazing things in my life at the moment, and I am sad at a few things people didn't do...
Lord, please help me in this.
In Blue Like Jazz, he says Jazz Music doesn't resolve...and Yet it seems thats sometimes what I want in my life...
Your will be done my Lord. Your kingdom Come.
Chan
I think the issue comes in when I open up to new things. I'm totally fine, on my own. Ok, that is an exaggeration, but truth be told, I enjoy reading, blogging, dreaming, watching series now, etc... Doing my own thing. I am found when I'm with God, I receive, he makes me " When the time comes, I'll be the one asking why...Why did I ever doubt you"... So when I'm in him, I am content... but then when I open up to relationships, I am always dissappointed when dissappointment comes. Maybe its cause I dont expect it. Or maybe its cause I'm stepping out and taking a risk...But why does it seem everyone else fits in so much easier, Why does it seem that others aren't walking alone...
And why I am I focused on the nots (nao's), instead of the ares...(Ser/Estar's)
Because the truth is God is doing pretty amazing things in my life at the moment, and I am sad at a few things people didn't do...
Lord, please help me in this.
In Blue Like Jazz, he says Jazz Music doesn't resolve...and Yet it seems thats sometimes what I want in my life...
Your will be done my Lord. Your kingdom Come.
Chan
Monday, July 28, 2014
Meus Spoonerisms
So funny did it again this morning... Instead of Shanghai Chicken I said Changhai Shicken...
The other day it was Acon and Begg.
Previously Bappy Hirthday...
I will keep adding more as I discover I do it.
The other day it was Acon and Begg.
Previously Bappy Hirthday...
I will keep adding more as I discover I do it.
Thursday, July 17, 2014
............
Ignoring things doesn't make it better. It seems so at first, but then should it occur again, the frustration comes out even more.
Dealing with things doesn't make it better either, in fact it makes it worse.
I don't know what to do.
Dealing with things doesn't make it better either, in fact it makes it worse.
I don't know what to do.
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Aprendo Portugues
Legal!
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100911060247AAQCOUq
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070817163506AAZ318k
http://www.nativlang.com/po/qg_pronouns_possessives.htm
http://forum.wordreference.com/showthread.php?t=1724089 para vs pra
http://www.conjuga-me.net/en/verbo-cantar cool congugate verb website
http://forum.wordreference.com/forumdisplay.php?f=16
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100911060247AAQCOUq
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070817163506AAZ318k
http://www.nativlang.com/po/qg_pronouns_possessives.htm
http://forum.wordreference.com/showthread.php?t=1724089 para vs pra
http://www.conjuga-me.net/en/verbo-cantar cool congugate verb website
http://forum.wordreference.com/forumdisplay.php?f=16
Tuesday, June 10, 2014
Thursday, May 29, 2014
progress for the week
tablets are up, so not excercising...
Just came accross a lecture by beni johnson: http://bssm2ndyearnotes.wordpress.com/2013/01/09/beni-johnson-wednesday-january-9-2013/
With cool quote: "So I’m going to share with you 7 pillars of physical health because I want you to be the healthiest church alive."
Gonna try this next week: A really simple detox is drinking 16-22oz of carrot juice every day for 5 weeks
So found sites:
http://www.healthambition.com/apple-beet-carrot-juice-liver-tonic/
http://www.healthambition.com/spicy-carrot-soup-recipe/
Awesomest sewing websites: http://seekatesew.com/
http://bssm2ndyearnotes.wordpress.com/category/danny-silk/
http://music.stackexchange.com/questions
http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/article-detail/Fruit-and-Vegetable-Juice-Recipes-for-Fasting-Detox-Juice-Recipes/am/
Detox Juice Recipes
The Go-To Recipe: Carrots & Apples, with a bit of Celery
3 Apples
2 Carrots
2 Celery Stalks
Celery is a diuretic that can help the body shed water retention. It is also a great source of naturally occurring sodium, which can help the body maintain its careful balance while you are fasting. Carrots are high in Vitamin A and make the juice taste sweet. Apple juices aid in digestion, the eradication of bodily toxins, and regulation of blood sugar and even blood pressure.
http://juicingforwomen.com/8-carrot-juice-benefits/
one cool website: http://www.diyncrafts.com/
Global Legacy Revival Themes = http://ignitinghope.com/blog/
Just came accross a lecture by beni johnson: http://bssm2ndyearnotes.wordpress.com/2013/01/09/beni-johnson-wednesday-january-9-2013/
With cool quote: "So I’m going to share with you 7 pillars of physical health because I want you to be the healthiest church alive."
Gonna try this next week: A really simple detox is drinking 16-22oz of carrot juice every day for 5 weeks
So found sites:
http://www.healthambition.com/apple-beet-carrot-juice-liver-tonic/
http://www.healthambition.com/spicy-carrot-soup-recipe/
Awesomest sewing websites: http://seekatesew.com/
http://bssm2ndyearnotes.wordpress.com/category/danny-silk/
http://music.stackexchange.com/questions
http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/article-detail/Fruit-and-Vegetable-Juice-Recipes-for-Fasting-Detox-Juice-Recipes/am/
Detox Juice Recipes
The Go-To Recipe: Carrots & Apples, with a bit of Celery
3 Apples
2 Carrots
2 Celery Stalks
Celery is a diuretic that can help the body shed water retention. It is also a great source of naturally occurring sodium, which can help the body maintain its careful balance while you are fasting. Carrots are high in Vitamin A and make the juice taste sweet. Apple juices aid in digestion, the eradication of bodily toxins, and regulation of blood sugar and even blood pressure.
http://juicingforwomen.com/8-carrot-juice-benefits/
one cool website: http://www.diyncrafts.com/
Global Legacy Revival Themes = http://ignitinghope.com/blog/
Thursday, May 22, 2014
Progress for the week
Tuesday, walked around the smaller block and did about 15 min of Zumba
Wed, walked around the bigger block and 20 min of Zumba, + 1 Carrot
Thurs, overslept, but had 1 carrot, 1 apple, and almost 1 l of water
Article regarding Apples : http://sheismore.com/682/
Article regarding Carrots/Skin: http://sheismore.com/4-ways-to-glowing-skin-year-round/
Wed, walked around the bigger block and 20 min of Zumba, + 1 Carrot
Thurs, overslept, but had 1 carrot, 1 apple, and almost 1 l of water
Article regarding Apples : http://sheismore.com/682/
Article regarding Carrots/Skin: http://sheismore.com/4-ways-to-glowing-skin-year-round/
http://en.amerikanki.com/foods-eat-every-day-for-perfect-skin/10/
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Jan 2014 Summer Holiday - Gauteng!
Prior to this holiday I was tired, drained, did not take leave throughout the year, as I was trying to save leave for going to Brazil. This didn't materialize, but later circumstances proved that this was the best decision. I then decided to visit a friend who was going overseas and my newly married cousin in Gauteng.
Camp at Krugersdorp
I arrived Thursday 9 January, was great to see my friend and her family, in a new place, the Friday I joined in their ministry camp, which was mostly relaxing, eating whenever we want, swimming, hiking and dancing.
Parasailing: Suspended in the Spirit :)
Apartheid Museum
We only spent an hour an a half at the museum, which although its not nearly enough to really take in all the comments and video that you can, I still felt the time was enough to spark in me to read and be exposed to more (Ernest Cole/Alan Paton/Chris Hani/Broederbond/Why IFP fought and killed ANC people/AWB trying to take control of Bophutatswana). Before we even reached the entrance, I felt sadness, which I know was not just me. I think sometimes to trully understand why people are stuck, you have to understand them or at least hear their story. The only gripe I had, which came not because of the museum, but because of a form you could fill in was what human rights, or issues do you experience. Or want to highlight. I filled it in, but I don't think I expressed it properly and all people may hear is my gripe and not what I am trying to say. Which is, in giving others freedom don't hamper on the freedom of others. E.g. a doctor who doesn't religiously/morally agree with abortion being forced to commit an abortion, or a priest being taken to court for not marrying a homosexual couple, or even the most recent trying to make it illegal to give children a hiding in your home. One person rights is restricting another's right to religion. Now there is a fine line here, and I am not saying that people do not have a right to their rights. But I feel like sometimes, things go to the other extreme. And for me looking at Mandela's life, he found away to get the freedom of the oppressed, but also include the opposition in the solution. Anyway Lord help me move towards being able to see everything in perspective, maybe my view is not right either, so give wisdom.
Camp at Krugersdorp
I arrived Thursday 9 January, was great to see my friend and her family, in a new place, the Friday I joined in their ministry camp, which was mostly relaxing, eating whenever we want, swimming, hiking and dancing.
Parasailing: Suspended in the Spirit :)
Apartheid Museum
We only spent an hour an a half at the museum, which although its not nearly enough to really take in all the comments and video that you can, I still felt the time was enough to spark in me to read and be exposed to more (Ernest Cole/Alan Paton/Chris Hani/Broederbond/Why IFP fought and killed ANC people/AWB trying to take control of Bophutatswana). Before we even reached the entrance, I felt sadness, which I know was not just me. I think sometimes to trully understand why people are stuck, you have to understand them or at least hear their story. The only gripe I had, which came not because of the museum, but because of a form you could fill in was what human rights, or issues do you experience. Or want to highlight. I filled it in, but I don't think I expressed it properly and all people may hear is my gripe and not what I am trying to say. Which is, in giving others freedom don't hamper on the freedom of others. E.g. a doctor who doesn't religiously/morally agree with abortion being forced to commit an abortion, or a priest being taken to court for not marrying a homosexual couple, or even the most recent trying to make it illegal to give children a hiding in your home. One person rights is restricting another's right to religion. Now there is a fine line here, and I am not saying that people do not have a right to their rights. But I feel like sometimes, things go to the other extreme. And for me looking at Mandela's life, he found away to get the freedom of the oppressed, but also include the opposition in the solution. Anyway Lord help me move towards being able to see everything in perspective, maybe my view is not right either, so give wisdom.
Sunday, January 19, 2014
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