Monday, September 17, 2012

September.... (Praise God!)

From my FB statuses today:

September... A month you may feel abandonment but it's because it's a month of deep reconciliation between man and God. God has been so busy with me the last few Septembers my next few statuses will update you!

17 September 2009, round about the same time, my dad and I head on the road to drive to Jeffrey's Bay so I can begin my 6 months missions program on the 18th. The previous Aug/Sep God spoke to me about More, More, More and on this day I took the big leap to pursue the more. If there was more to be had I wanted to go all the way. I wanted all of me to know all of him.So left home, family, friends, familiar to follow Jesus!    Also remember the amazing significance of my dad driving with me, (this was cause I didn't leave the morning as I was supposed to and he didn't want me to drive alone in dark) but it was awesome for my father to take/give me away to grow my relationship with my Father. So tomorrow will be 3years since DTS began!

September 2010, 17 September. I was in a car with 2 friends, on my way to visit YWAM Worcester for the weekend not realizing it was same time left for YWAM Jbay. In the car we had a convo about a guy who I was seeing but was really not good for my walk with God, etc. And I asked if they would pray with me, by the end of the weekend, I was greatly encouraged and a bit back to my passionate love and pursuing God which I had not been for months and the Sunday coming home was the beginning of the end of me and the guy which I was so broken up about then but so grateful now!

September 2011, Yesterday last year I finallllyyy graduated from my Btech IT, but last year was such a significant turn around month, Besides finding out my arthritis was back, I felt I'm tired of being a baby Christian when despite my best efforts for over ten years of being saved, everyone grew past me. I said God I give up... I can't anymore, I can't just be going to heaven, but I don't get to know you, hear you, experience you like everyone else. If I can't have go deeper, then I rather don't want to be a Christian, cause tired of being a half Christian. So I gave up! And for  3 days I sulked like the person who tells their spouse I'm leaving u,but then sleeps on the couch. Because I realized only reason why I sleep in dark is cause He is with me, only reason I can listen to all doc's negative reports is because He is telling me opposite, I can't with him! But I can't without him!!! So september 2011 I gave up, my Christianity, i didn't give up that God is all powerful and amazing but on my ability to tap into and be what a Christian should and could be. And didn't want to keep trying and fail anymore but after 3 days God said....

September 2011, God said You gave up. Good!!! I was just waiting for you to give up. Now I can be God. It started with a little bit of tiny rain drops while a friend spoke a word of rest and peace over my life. By the Saturday, I was the main prize winner at Kuier magazine event, a holiday for 2 with dinner and spar treatment, the a month later won R500 Markhams voucher, then a Pepsi key ring, then got my R160 phone upgraded to a blackberry, my Corsa to a yaris, then won a bamboo wood chopping board worth R280, then got a job at Europe's best IT service provider for the salary I wanted, and a month later moved out.I am now 6 months employed and the blessings just keep continuing. I think God is trying to say, "Do you get it yet, that I love you!!! How can I overwhelm and shower you with my goodness and favour! I still feel like such a baby in the Lord and there are things that are pressing and concerns. But today I wanna look back and say thank you! God you have been more than faithful, you have given me grace, you are really God, and no matter how I may feel, the truth is even when we are faithless You a faithful !!! Thank you Jesus for calling me and loving me first. Father I surrender once again and lay every crown at your feet. I choose to trust You and lift my eyes to You. May the next year to next September, be all that You plan for me Lord and for your glory. My only prayer is that you would also show my loved ones, the grace you have shown me. That Father you would reveal your heart as Jesus is introduced to them. That they would come to know, receive and be transformed by your love. That peace, strength healing and the life of God would be their portion. That you would bring favour and freedom to us all, and of course my children's children :) Thank You Lord!

So this September, no matter how lonely, overwhelmed, broke, hurting, helpless, abandoned we feel, by faith we look up to God. He first loved us, and his grace is sufficient, in fact more than enough! Isaiah 54: “For a brief moment I abandoned you,but with deep compassion I will bring you back. In a surge of anger I hid my face from you for a moment, but with everlasting kindness I will have compassion on you,” says the Lord your Redeemer. (Isaiah 54:7, 8 NIV84)

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